Introduction:
Pride marches in the Balkans
Pride parades are the street celebrations of lesbian, gay, transgender and queer love. The first Pride Parade in the world was held on June 28 1969 in New York City. By now, Pride parades are being organized on each continent, in more than 55 countries in around 400 cities. In the Balkans, so far Pride parades have been organized in Belgrade, Zagreb, Sofia, Budva, and Podgorica. Of all the countries in the Balkans, celebrations of love, without fear, are being held in Athens – seventh year in a row, with around half million people out on the streets, and in Thessaloniki second time in 2013. Every street celebration of Pride shows successful work of the courageous activists for lesbian, gay, transgender and queer human rights.
First activities in our region began in
Slovenia during eighties, and after that in Croatia and Serbia. Today, the movement
is also active in Bosnia and Herzegovina, Montenegro, Macedonia, Kosovo and
Albania. However, the political elites are actively providing space for the
nationalists to continue intimidation against LGBT activists and
manifestations. Pro – nationalist political parties and religious institutions
in the Balkans produce militarist and nationalist values – which at the same
time always include sexist and homophobic campaigns with the sole purpose to
intimidate citizens.
In our region, organized violence against
LGBT people began in 2001 on the first Pride parade in Belgrade, continued in a
smaller range on the first Zagreb Pride 2002, Queer Festivals in Belgrade and
Sarajevo in 2008, Belgrade Pride 2010, Split Pride 2011, Budva Pride and
Podgorica Pride in 2013. Manifestations of violence are numerous: verbal
threats, insults, intimidation through internet and media, organized mass
gatherings of extreme nationalists – football fans, then shouting hateful expressions,
throwing various objects on the participants, throwing fire crackers, smoke
bombs, stones, physical attacks and
organizing counter events in the name of celebration of ‘family values’.
This information contains valuable experiences
that contribute to the systematic preparation of those who made the decision to
attend Pride parades in countries where extreme nationalists announce violence.
Introduction:
emotions are important
If we are planning to attend those public manifestations,
where there is a possibility to feel afraid, here is some basic knowledge on
emotions that could be helpful:
o
We are feeling all the time
o
It is good to feel – our emotions are our treasure
o
Every emotion is precious, because it belongs to us
o
It’s important that we accept our emotions – that process lasts
for life
o
Violence produces stress or trauma – emotions that usually follow therefore
are fear, panic, helplessness, guilt, shame and feeling of inferiority,
situation of humiliation, anger, rage, and sadness.
o
Expressing emotions with responsibility is good for us but also
for the community. For us: because it has healing effect for our soul, and for
the community, because it sends the message that we are powerful because we
express our emotions and we are here with our fears, pain, anger – we are on
the street and confronting the organized hatred
o
Expressing emotions with responsibility implies expressing
emotions in a way that does not endanger others. That is brave. For example, it
is good if we cry. If we are angry
because of the violence, we can shout. If we are scared, we can ask someone to
hold our hand. It is good to ask others for support, and it is good when others
ask us, it only shows that we are strong and assertive.
o
It is very important to know that people who are participating in
the Pride parade for the first time, who are coming from cities with patriarchal
experience, or from multi marginalized groups – are particularly sensitive.
BEFORE THE STREET
It is good
to allow our feelings simply to exist
Preparation, in details
-
We recall ourselves of our common reactions when violence occurs
in public. Everyone reacts differently, and it is important for us to be able
to identify in advance the possible reaction to fear: someone freezes, someone
has the urge to run, someone starts crying, and someone wants to fight…. etc.
Each of these reactions is good.
-
If we react violently to the feeling of fear, it is good to think
in advance of a way to express our aggression whilst avoiding becoming violent
towards others around us. We can think of ways that would be supportive for
everyone: waving with the rainbow flag that requires a lot of bodywork, singing
empowering songs out loud, or banging the drums as hard as possible.
-
It is good to make an agreement with a friend – on how to support
each other having in mind our different reactions.
-
It is good to precisely discuss about expectations that we have
from one another if it comes to violence. Fear is a normal reaction when we are
surrounded with violence. For example, some people want others to hold their
hand, or just ask how you are, or to
be nearby, and inform them when they wish to go somewhere else…etc.
-
For example, during preparations for the Split Pride 2012, it was
mentioned that there might be violence, so couple of activists arranged with
their friends who were willing to hold their hands in case they become
overwhelmed with fear. The arrangement itself already eased the fear, during
the parade, they were holding each other hands, and that was very nice for many
and induced positive reactions in others.
-
If you have not arranged in advance with some of your friends, you
can do it at the beginning of the manifestation. Usually there is time for
making arrangements. Find someone you can trust to be near you.
-
Part of getting ready is to arrange with those who will not go out
in the streets, who will watch TV, search for news on the internet, send SMS, or
observe the event from different angle and support us. Their support is as
important as the support from those who are walking with us.
-
Offer your support to others. We can also have control over our
fear if we care about others.
-
Experiences showed that it could be important to bring some object
or clothing that has empowering effect on us and reminds us of the benevolent
energy that we have for ourselves. There are many examples, one lesbian carried
lesbian flag over her shoulder each year on Split Pride on one hand for protection
and on the other for safety, some wore their favorite cap that protected them
from stones and gave them strength…
Preparation, appearance
-- Outfit:
it is good to think beforehand about what clothes are important, how we want to
look on the Pride day. Our appearance represents our politics but we can also
use it as protection: experience of some activists is that they want to wear
things on LGBT street manifestation they could never wear in homophobic daily
routine. Others want to be unrecognizable and thus they wear sunglasses, or
wrap themselves in flags or wear something totally different then usual, wear
make up, etc.
-- Footwear: it is important for some to have cozy shoes, sneakers
or boots because then they feel safe and
ready to run if necessary.
-- Head: hat or headscarf is important for some women, because it protects
them from sun or hard objects that perpetrators throw at us. Some like to draw
on their faces with colors, lipstick or tinsels.
-- Physiological needs: it is
good to plan everything regarding food, drinks, cold or heat, etc., before attending public manifestations
-- Bags – backpacks: it is
important to plan whether we will carry bag or backpack that would be easy
for us to carry around and put inside everything we need, or we can keep
everything we need in our pockets.
-- Cell phones: it is important to prepare cell phones with enough
credit for calls and SMS, or to arrange with those who stayed at home to call
us.
We remind ourselves that we are
on the street for ourselves, but that we also represent our LGBT community
Preparation,
mental
-- Mental
preparation for manifestation is also important. It can mean that we think of
some empowering sentence (For example, we talk to ourselves: Gay is OK, Lesbian
happiness is the greatest, Queer is cool, etc.)
-- International
experiences showed that all kinds of preparations are crucial for the feeling
of safety when we are in unsafe situation or crisis. For example, choosing the
leaflets, banners, whistles, planning with whom we’re going to walk, whether
we’ll walk in the front where we will be photographed or in the back to be less
visible…etc. It is also important to know the planned route, in advance, as
well as, who are the people from organization committee.
--
Experience showed that it is good to plan where and with whom are we going to
go after the street manifestation.
-- It is
important for the organizers to know that it is necessary to pay attention
particularly to the activists from small places, conservative countries and
troubled areas.
-- We are
reminding ourselves that Pride parade is our basic human right, and that
history will prove us right
Our presence on the street is the
political act
ON THE STREET
If the
violence occurs and we have intense emotions:
We decide what is safe to do in that moment:
to stay in same place, move….
o
We notice what we feel in that moment without judging or analyzing
our feelings.
o
We breathe with awareness of our feelings.
o
It’s good to allow our feeling to exist
o We do not have to do anything with them, just to accept that it is what we feel and talk about it. Everything that is in our body is good. For example, we are aware of our heart racing, fast or shallow breathing, palms sweating…. and we accept all of that as normal.
o We do not have to do anything with them, just to accept that it is what we feel and talk about it. Everything that is in our body is good. For example, we are aware of our heart racing, fast or shallow breathing, palms sweating…. and we accept all of that as normal.
o
We express our feelings with responsibility – so we do not
endanger others. If we feel anger, and have the urge to express it, doesn’t
mean that we should start fighting with the police or the fascists to get rid
of that emotion, but it means that we can say out loud what we want to say.
o
If we feel like crying, we are letting ourselves to cry
o
We can say to ourselves the words we need to hear in that moment,
for example “I’m ok, I’m safe”.
o
We do not react to violence with violence because it will not
change the situation.
o Walking near people of authority can grant us the feeling of
safety, for example near politicians, foreigners or public figures.
o
We are using the information/support over the phone from those who
are not walking with us.
AFTER THE STREET
o
We arrange in advance so we do not stay alone after the
manifestation, to know where and with whom we will go to talk. It is important
that the space (café, flat) be near the place of event, but also a space where
we can talk.
o Experience showed that after the manifestation it is important to
meet with our friends (activists) to exchange experiences. The best way to learn
what to do next time is by talking with others about what happened at the Pride
parade, what we did, felt, what were our experiences, what we learned this
time.
o
Emotions that we felt when we were on the street are our emotions
from before. If we experienced great fear, that feeling can stay with us for
quite some time after the event. It is important to understand our emotions
seriously, seek for support, talk, read, and organize counseling or workshops.
o
We should award ourselves for being courageous to participate in
the historical event.
Authors of the text lepa Mladjenovic & Suncica Vucaj
Counseling for Lesbians: sos.lezz@gmail.com
No comments:
Post a Comment